


What a Captain Wants (aka - Tuning into Jim Kirk Radio)

by Silent_So_Long



Series: What A Captain Wants [1]
Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Humor, M/M, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-11
Updated: 2012-02-11
Packaged: 2017-10-30 23:40:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/337488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silent_So_Long/pseuds/Silent_So_Long
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leonard finds himself the sole recipient of Jim Kirk Radio after an accident in his bathroom, involving one wet doctor’s body and his communicator.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What a Captain Wants (aka - Tuning into Jim Kirk Radio)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Reel Love - a RomCom challenge hosted by the jim_and_bones community. My choice of movie was What Women Want, although I used the actual plot as a jumping point for my fic. The Nepenthe spiders that are mentioned in the latter half of this story are borrowed respectfully from Blackout, book 6 in Rob Thurman‘s Cal Leandros series. No prior knowledge of said books is necessary for the reading of my story - all you need to know is the Nepenthe spiders are mean little jobbies, with a venomous bite capable of inducing amnesia. No spiders were harmed in the making of this fic, nor were any doctors or captains.

“Dammit, Jim, will you just sit still, man?” Leonard asked, gruffly, as Jim’s slender form squirted from the biobed in a wriggling mass of complaining red-faced captaincy.

“You know how I react to hyposprays,” Jim complained, pushing the doctor away as Leonard tried jabbing the hypo into Jim's neck again and missing the captain completely. “Every time you inject me with one of those things, something happens. My hands have inflated, my tongue went numb and I’m not even mentioning the time it affected certain parts of my anatomy I didn’t want you to see in a bad way.” 

“It wasn’t that bad, Jim,” Leonard said, trying to hide a smile as he tried again to stab Jim’s neck with his hypo and to sink the antibiotics successfully into the other man‘s system. “The purple spots looked particularly good with your skin tones.” 

“You don’t know what it’s like being me, Bones,” Jim said, huffing out and finally giving in to Leonard’s large hands and ever present hypospray. “If you could see in my head right now, you’d know how much pain and discomfort those hypos cause me. I blame you, you know.” 

“No, you don’t; I’m a doctor, not a torturer. I’m doing it out of love. You’d be the first to complain if I left you suffering from pollen poisoning, or when you had an allergic reaction to pizza. I mean, honestly, Jim? Who has an allergy to goddamned pizza?” Leonard snorted.

“It was the sauce, Bones. I hate chilli sauce. It gives me the gripe, and a nasty rash,” Jim grumped back. “Are you finished torturing me now?” 

“For today. Leave you alone for three minutes and I’m sure you’ll be back in here in no time,” Leonard sighed.

Jim merely stood and wriggled away from Leonard with a grateful grin and an accusatory glare at the remainder of the hyposprays Leonard had arrayed before him. Leonard shooed him away and so Jim missed the affectionate smile that Leonard directed to his back. 

~~~~

Later that evening and Leonard was alone in his quarters, getting himself ready for his evening shower. Every muscle in his body ached, and his skin felt slightly dirty from long hours in the sick bay. His clothes had been stripped from his body and lay in a crumpled heap upon the floor, which he studiously avoided with every movement he made. He yawned, one hand scratching at his naked abdomen as he finally stepped into the shower cubicle to wash himself. The soothing warm waters of the shower flowed across his body, easing aches in every muscle and smoothing some of the tension that held his shoulders in its sway. He sighed and concentrated upon lathering great handfuls of soap across his body. 

Once he’d finished, he stepped from the cubicle, skin glistening, eyes closed as he sawed off another loud yawn. He blindly reached for his towel, even as his communicator bleeped loudly. He reached for it, snagging it out of his pile of clothes, wet fingers closing around the device firmly. He cursed loudly as an electric shock arced from his communicator to his fingers. His foot snagged in his pile of abandoned clothing, toes catching in familiar fabric that snagged and snarled against his clean skin. He couldn’t stop himself from falling, tall frame pole-axed and helpless. His head connected with the side of his basin, causing him to black out momentarily.

Some time later and Leonard groaned himself into consciousness, head aching and sore from where he’d hit it. Jim was by his side, hands resting upon Leonard’s naked shoulders and the doctor was grateful for the other man’s regard for his dignity - Jim had draped a towel across Leonard’s waist.

“Are you alright?” Jim asked, eyes and hands never leaving Leonard’s face nor body.

“Dammit, Jim, what the devil are you doing in my bathroom?” Leonard asked, as he struggled to sit.

“I tried contacting you through your communicator but you didn’t answer. I came straight over, and keyed in the override code when you didn’t answer your door. You were unconscious, Bones,” Jim said, as he helped the doctor climb to his feet.

“I got an electric shock from my damned communicator, hit my head on the basin. I’m fine,” Leonard said, hands grabbing at the towel to prevent it from falling to the floor and potentially flashing the captain again. 

Jim was grinning as he caught the arcing movements of Leonard’s hands. 

“I’ve seen you naked, Bones,” he commented, with a cheeky wink in Leonard’s scowling face. 

“Lap it up, Jim,” Leonard said. “It won’t be an everyday occurrence. Now get me to bed.” 

“Yeah? Propositioning me already? I like this,” Jim said, with a chuckle. “Might I remind you it’s me who saw you naked. I should be propositioning you.”

“I’m gonna take that as a compliment. I’m tired, Jim. I need sleep,” Leonard grumbled, as Jim helped him over to his bed.

“Maybe some other night, then,” Jim said, diplomatically.

“Yeah, if you want,” Leonard mumbled, as he slid beneath his covers and promptly fell asleep. 

Jim chuckled and shook his head, before creeping quietly from the room. 

~~~~

“Damn, but Bones looks good today,” Jim’s voice floated over to Leonard, as the doctor walked nonchalantly onto the Bridge the next morning.

“What did you just say, Jim?” Leonard barked, unable to believe what he’d just heard from the Captain's mouth.

Jim frowned at Leonard, looking genuinely confused.

“I didn’t say anything, Bones,” Jim said, with a baffled shrug.

“You did,” Leonard said, as Uhura gave him a confused stare as well. 

“He didn’t. He was eating,” she said, quietly, carefully pointing to the beef sandwich still clutched in Jim’s hand. 

Jim even had the audacity to have tomato ketchup smeared across his lips, Leonard noticed and he tried not to think too hard upon the sudden notion of wanting to kiss that ketchup away, a not unfamiliar reaction to Jim himself, Leonard had found. The doctor had wanted to kiss Jim, had wanted Jim himself, for as long as he could remember, yet had done nothing to act upon his feelings for the other man.

“Must have misheard,” Leonard said, as he settled himself upon the side of the captain's chair.

“Huh. He’s even used that cologne I like,” Jim muttered, next.

“Dammit, Jim, I don’t wear this cologne for you, you know,” Leonard barked into Jim’s suddenly confused face, jaws moving rhythmically around his current mouthful. 

Jim shrugged for a moment, unable to talk because of the sheer amount of food packing his cheeks out. Leonard frowned and glanced to Spock, who was calmly staring back at him. Even if Spock had previously spoken, his voice was nothing like Jim’s, more steadied and calm where Jim’s was animated and excitable. 

“I’m not saying you do, Bones. Why d’you think that?” Jim asked, sounding as puzzled as he looked, despite the fact his speech was still somewhat muffled by remnants of his sandwich.

“No reason. I just thought you liked it, is all,” Leonard mumbled incoherently, as he ruffled his hand over his face in confusion.

“I do, but I don’t know why you keep talking about it,” Jim said, before biting rather viciously at his sandwich. 

“It does seem rather illogical that Leonard seems focussed upon his cologne today,” Spock offered, serenely. “Are you quite alright, Doctor?” 

“I don’t think so,” Leonard said, faintly, as the sounds of Jim proclaiming that he’d like to know what cologne it actually was “Old Spice, Jim. Listen, can you not hear that?”

“Hear what?” Spock asked, tilting his head to the side as he stared at Leonard quizzically.

“Jim,” Leonard said.

“Quite frequently, yes,” Spock said. “After all, he is our captain. He needs to be heard on occasion.” 

“Not what I meant. Did you not hear him just saying he liked my cologne?” Leonard asked.

“Only when you asked him about it,” Uhura said, quietly. “Are you sure you’re alright?” 

“No. I don’t know what the devil’s going on,” Leonard said, helplessly. 

“You and me both, cupcake,” Jim said, with a snort. 

Leonard couldn’t help but wonder if he was going a little mad, or if perhaps the Bridge crew were playing a humungous joke upon him. 

“I haven’t been sleeping well. Damned space is getting to me,” Leonard mumbled.

“Go to Nurse Chapel. She’ll sort you out with a sleeping draught,” Jim said, as he clapped one tomato ketchup stained hand against Leonard’s thigh. 

Leonard didn’t even flinch; instead, he nodded at Jim’s suggestion, a look of distraction upon his face.

“Perhaps I’ll do that,” he mumbled, even as Spock and Uhura returned their attentions to their stations. 

~~~~

That night, Leonard was awakened from his drugged sleep from the remnants of a dream, that seemed, bizarrely, all about him. It was as though he were viewing himself through another’s eyes, albeit coloured by a somewhat shy and tender love. Despite feeling touched by the raw emotion on display, Leonard screamed obscenities to whoever was dreaming about him, to just stop already, damnit. He didn’t think it would do any good however, even as he lay back to sleep again himself. Sleep itself was surprisingly easy to attain, and the dreams didn’t come back to bother him again, that night.

~~~~

Over the course of a few days, Leonard was convinced he was going mad. He seemed all too painfully aware of Jim everywhere he went; Jim’s voice was in his head all the time, even when the other man was doing something mundane as deciding what to eat or what film to watch next. Quite frankly, it was beginning to drive Leonard to distraction, especially considering Jim’s was the only voice he could hear. When he’d tried concentrating upon Christine, for instance, all he received was a quizzical look in return and the nurse’s immediate question of - “Are you alright, Len?”

Uhura was no different and neither was Scotty. He didn’t even try scanning Spock’s mind; after all, he didn’t think he could stand knowing for certain just what the Vulcan thought of him. Leonard then got to wondering whether Jim could hear his thoughts as clearly as Leonard heard his. He stared at Jim on occasion, purposefully pushing his thoughts Jim’s way, trying to think of all the swearwords he could muster and hurling them at Jim’s head. He even tried thinking nursery rhymes that he used to sing to Joanna and recited the entirety of Granma McCoy’s cookbook by rote. Jim didn’t even flinch, not even when Leonard reached the recipe for chilli pepper cornbread, which by rights should have made Jim’s head explode. It certainly made Leonard feel like that every time that he ate it. 

“Dammit, Jim,” Leonard growled quietly, making Jim turn, suddenly.

“What have I done now, Bones?” Jim asked in genuine confusion. “I was just sitting here minding my own business and then you start with your Dr Cranky routine behind my back.”

“No reason, Jim. Go back to sleep, m’dear,” Leonard said, still half-thinking of Joanna.

“Did you just call me m’dear?” Jim said, a smile brightening his eyes.

“Might have,” Leonard mumbled, turning a bright brick red over his slip of the tongue. “I’ve gotta go back to Sickbay, Jim. I don’t feel well.” 

“Bones?” Jim called out to him as Leonard wheeled around and walked hurriedly off.

The last thing that Leonard heard was Jim’s voice saying - Damn. Bones’ ass looks really good in those pants. Leonard nearly ran from the room, even though he felt quite pleased with the compliment. 

~~~~

“Jesus Christ on a cracker, I really think I’m running mad or somethin’,” Leonard mumbled as he scrolled through pages of medical text on his PADD focussing upon head traumas and its adverse effects.

“What makes you think that?” Christine asked, as she passed.

“No reason,” Leonard muttered, too embarrassed to divulge anything to his head nurse.

“You’ve not been yourself lately, Len,” Christine observed, as she leant against his desk with one hip cocked. 

“Understatement,” Leonard replied, sighing as he tossed his PADD aside in disgust.

“What is it? Is it Jim?” Christine asked.

“What the devil makes you think it’s Jim?” Leonard asked, sharply as he impaled the nurse with a sharp glance. 

“You two are an item, aren’t you?” Christine asked, with a confused frown.

“An item? What the devil are you talking about, woman?” Leonard asked, standing so abruptly he towered over Christine. 

“Well, aren’t you? We’ve all noticed the way you’ve both been staring at each other, especially lately. I just thought - well, we all thought you were a couple or something, and maybe had a lover’s tiff,” she said, looking embarrassed now. 

“A tiff? We’re not in 18th century England for Christ’s sake, Christine,” Leonard barked. “A tiff. Honestly. If that was all that it was.” 

“So there is something going on between you two?” Christine asked. “Or are we all being presumptuous?” 

“You’re being presumptuous, darlin’,” Leonard replied, dryly. “At least, I think you are. I don’t know what the hell’s going on any more.” 

“I don’t think I do, either,” Christine admitted, watching Leonard closely. 

“Never mind,” Leonard replied, with a weary sigh. “I’m sure I can find an answer to this, eventually. Get back to work.”

“Okay. If you ever wanna talk, you know where to find me,” Christine said, before walking away.

Leonard couldn’t help but notice the way that Christine threw a worried glance over her shoulder in his direction.

~~~~

Leonard read every last piece of medical text and trivia that he could find on his PADD, with regards to adverse effects occurring when a patient hit his or her head. He had already found plenty of texts focussing upon bizarre cases; from a tale of a woman recovering from a particularly bad migraine had found that her usual English accent had been replaced by a Chinese one, to accounts of people attaining psychic abilities and more. Leonard could find next to nothing in regards to people becoming telepathically attached to just one person, and his frustration grew with every medical text discarded. 

He began watching old vids, in hopes of finding more answers there, with little to no luck. Finally he stumbled upon an ancient movie that Leonard had never heard of which focussed upon a man suffering an unusual side effect after hitting his head. That man, a highly paid and equally highly driven professional working in the advertising business, was particularly attuned to hearing women’s thoughts. That effect was only reversed when he admitted his feelings for the person he loved the most.

Leonard sat back in his chair once the movie had finished, a thoughtful expression upon his face. All he could think of was Jim, and the various ways with which he could and should tell the other man he loved him. After all, he knew that he wouldn’t be lying; he‘d been harbouring feelings for Jim for a very long time. The only thing that bothered Leonard was the timing of when to actually tell Jim. 

~~~~

“Dammit, Jim, stop creeping around,” Leonard said, without even looking up from where he sat at his desk.

“I wasn’t creeping around, “Jim said, in surprise, as he stopped on the other side of the doctor’s desk, a surprised expression on his face. “How did you know it was me?” 

Leonard glowered at Jim, still remembering the happy thoughts that Jim had had about seeing Leonard again just before entering his office. Despite finding the intrusion of Jim’s thoughts a constant drain and a hell of an imposition, Leonard found himself touched on more than one occasion by the sheer weight of how highly Jim seemed to hold Leonard in his esteem. Such feelings only confirmed that Leonard’s own feelings for Jim were definitely reciprocated. 

Every thought Jim had was accompanied by an increased heart rate, excitement building in Jim’s stomach and transmuted to Leonard’s own. Leonard had also noticed that Jim seemed more skittish than usual in his presence, trying to attract Leonard’s attention in ever more obvious ways. Leonard couldn’t help but find that more than a little endearing. He resolved once more to reveal his feelings to Jim as soon as he got the chance.

“Let’s just say I was aware of your presence, Jim,” Leonard said, getting up to stand a little too closely to the captain. 

Jim grinned at him, unconsciously leaning into him as he spoke.

“Sure you can’t be convinced to beam down to Chicanus?” Jim asked, watching Leonard’s face hopefully. “You’re the one who’s always so insistent upon the crew taking shore leave. While we’re in orbit, you might want to take your own advice.”

Leonard reached out, laying one hand unconsciously upon Jim’s shoulder. 

“I can’t, Jim. I’ve gotta oversee a few surgeries, today,” Leonard said, regretfully. “Maybe another time, huh?”

“Yeah,” Jim said, and Leonard could feel Jim’s disappointment. 

“Just keep yourself safe,” Leonard said, as he clapped Jim hard upon his shoulder. “I know what you’re like on shore leave. You’re a trouble magnet; you end up more times in my Sickbay than the entire crew combined.” 

Jim’s thoughts filtered through to Leonard again - anything to be near you.

“I like having you around, Jim, despite it all,” Leonard said, in response, without even meaning to. “Listen, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something - “

Jim’s communicator bleeped seconds before Spock’s voice filtered through, calling the Captain away on an errand that Leonard swore seemed fabricated just to spite him. Jim frowned, even as he told the Vulcan he’d be right there. 

“Tell me later, Bones,” Jim said, before turning away and walking from the room. 

For some reason, the doctor had a bad feeling, as though Jim was walking away to face some unknown doom alone. 

~~~~ 

Leonard raced over as soon as Jim was brought into the sickbay that afternoon, body prone and lax between Spock and Scotty. Scotty was shouting something in rapid-fire staccato rhythms, Scottish accent seeming all the broader for his anxiety and concern for the captain. Leonard was barely listening, focussing more upon the slumped form of his captain, skin a deathly pale white against his sandy hair.

“Don’t die on me, Jim, you bastard,” Leonard growled as he readied a virtual plethora of hyposprays. “I need you here, goddamnit.”

“I believe that we are all in need of the captain,” Spock pointed out, far too calmly, given the nature of Jim’s circumstances.

One pointed glare from Leonard and the Vulcan melted away, to watch from a distance without endangering himself to immolation via doctor’s death glare. Leonard searched Jim’s brain without even thinking about it, all too used to the intrusion of Jim’s thoughts in his head by now to even think twice about reversing the process. He found the source of the problem almost immediately, corroborated by Scotty’s wild gesticulations about a giant spider.

From what Leonard could determine from Scotty’s mad ramblings and Jim’s jumbled and unconscious recollections, was that a giant spider, alarmingly known as a Nepenthe spider, had lurched out of the ground while they were on Chicanus, biting Jim heftily upon the leg. Within seconds, the captain had been rendered unconscious, to which Scotty and Spock had beamed instantly aboard with Jim in tow. 

Leonard grunted in acceptance, before dismissing both Scotty and Spock. He paged through various medical texts upon his PADD, looking for the appropriate antidote to stave off poison by Nepenthe spider bite. The cure, when he found it, was easy to simulate. He set to work immediately, leaving Christine in charge of sickbay for the duration. Once he’d successfully managed to simulate the antidote, he loaded the resultant bright pink liquid into his hypospray and shot it into the side of Jim’s neck. 

Leonard stayed by Jim’s side, watching over the captain, knowing that Christine was keeping careful watch over the Sickbay in his absence. After an interminable - to Leonard - wait, the pallor finally started to leave Jim’s skin, pink sheen returning to his cheeks by all too slow degrees. Leonard continued his vigilant watch over Jim for the rest of the afternoon, one hand clutching at Jim’s alarmingly cold fingers, thumb rubbing at the other man’s knuckles gently.

Leonard watched Jim’s far too still face, the loss of his voice inside Leonard's head quite jarring. He hadn’t realized then just how much Jim’s voice had been a comfort to him until it was gone, despite finding the intrusion quite disconcerting at first. He realized not for the first time how much he really cared for Jim, blossoming from initial friendship into something more visceral and far deeper than mere friendship. A pang of sadness coiled uncomfortably in his stomach at that, and he wondered if he’d ever get the chance to tell Jim. 

He watched the relaxed face of Jim sleeping, at the way his chest rose and fell in steady time. Leonard continued stroking Jim’s too lax fingers in his hand, trying to massage some warmth back into him again.

“Dammit, Jim, don’t do this to me,” Leonard mumbled as he stared at Jim’s lax face. “Come back to me, darlin’.” 

Jim, typically didn’t answer.

~~~~

Leonard was roused by the familiar sight of Christine’s concerned face staring down at him, one small hand resting upon his shoulder as she shook him awake. He mumbled an obscenity and straightened in his seat, one large hand pawing at his sleepy eyes to try and wake himself up. 

“You’ve been there all night, Len,” Christine said, sounding judgemental.

“Could you sound any less judgemental, Christine?” Leonard replied, gruffly. “I was staying with Jim, wasn’t I?” 

“Says the person who insisted there was nothing going on between you,” Christine countered, with a teasing smile. “Are you still so sure about that? You don’t stay beside every patient’s bed when they’re ill.” 

“A person can be wrong,” Leonard said, as he stared down at the too still face of Jim still sleeping beside him.

“Does he know?” Christine asked, as she turned her gaze towards Jim again.

“No,” Leonard replied, simply.

“Don’t you think it time to tell him?” Christine asked. 

“Maybe,” Leonard replied, before changing the subject. “Has he not stirred at all?”

“I don’t know. Unlike you, I haven’t been there all night. Let’s just say he hasn’t made a peep all the time I have been here,” Christine replied, sounding more worried than teasing again. 

Leonard sighed and carded one hand gently through the tuft of hair that curled up from Jim’s forehead, before dropping his hand, realizing what he’d just done. 

“It’s okay, Len; you can do it,” Christine said, softly from behind him. “I’m not going to laugh.”

Leonard glanced at her, and while Christine wasn’t directly staring at him, he noted the look of soft concern upon her face. No laughter brightened her eyes nor curled her lips. He smiled tightly at her, before he said - “You’re a wonderful woman, Christine.”

“So I’ve been told, although never by you,” Christine replied. 

Leonard grumbled something incoherent and didn’t immediately reply. Christine stood silently by, one hand now resting upon Leonard’s shoulder as they both watched Jim. Christine finally withdrew quietly, leaving Leonard alone to watch over the too silent Jim. 

~~~~

Over the course of the next few days, Leonard stopped by Jim’s bedside, whenever he could, spending as much time as he could spare from his duties to watch over the still unconscious captain.

“Dammit, Jim, wake up,” Leonard said on the third morning.

Jim didn’t wake up. 

~~~~

On the fifth morning, Jim woke up and Leonard wasn’t at his side. The doctor was asleep, dead to the world after many an hour either working or napping in an uncomfortable chair by Jim’s bedside. Spock toggled the comm at Leonard’s door, waking the doctor with a loud and insistent call. Leonard staggered to the door when Spock didn’t immediately go away and palmed it open, staring blearily out at the Vulcan waiting quietly in the corridor.

“Can’t a man get a decent night’s sleep around here, anymore? What is it, Spock?” Leonard asked, trying to struggle his tousled hair into place with one hand and failing miserably.

“You wished to be informed of Jim’s wakefulness, Doctor. I am here to tell you that Jim, is indeed, awake,” Spock said, without inflection. “He has been awake for several hours.” 

“Dammit, man, why couldn’t you have told me before?” Leonard asked, as he took off at a run, still in his sleepwear and his cheeks liberally dusted with stubble. 

“I believe I just did, sir,” Spock called after him. “Besides which, you needed your sleep. You may wish to thank me later.” 

Leonard didn’t hear him, already too far away to catch the Vulcan’s last words. 

He exploded into the Sickbay in a flurry of activity, almost bowling one of the nurses over before lolloping over to Jim’s bedside. Jim was propped up upon his pillow, sipping from a spoon that dipped methodically into a bowl filled with steaming chicken soup. His face, although still pale, looked reasonably more healthy than it had before. His face split into a grin when he saw the dishevelled appearance of Leonard and his rarely seen sleep-wear, before his face fell, confusion reigning supreme upon his face.

“What the hell happened to you, Bones? You look worse than I do and I’m the patient,” Jim said, eyes roving worriedly over Leonard’s body.

“I was worrying about you, you idiot,” Leonard replied. “What the hell were you doing?”

“I didn’t plan on getting bitten by a spider,” Jim pouted. “Besides, I couldn’t even remember a thing when I first woke up. I had first-grade amnesia. I don’t know what Nurse Chapel did to bring my memories back but she did it gently. I doubt you would have done it as gently as she did.”

“I would have done,” Leonard replied, indignantly. “I’m gentle when I wanna be.” 

“Now that I’d like to see. She also told me you didn’t leave my side and you were like a lovesick puppy for five days,” Jim smirked. “Is that true, Bones?” 

“I don’t know about the puppy part. I don’t think I have the right build for puppies,” Leonard complained, with an affronted frown, as he glared down at his own body.

“I notice you didn’t deny the part about being lovesick,” Jim said, with a triumphant smirk. 

Leonard glanced up at Jim, mouth gaping open, unable to process what to say next. Jim grinned, hand snaking out to take Leonard’s, fingers stroking over the backs of Leonard’s knuckles when the other man didn’t take his hand away. 

“It’s alright to admit you love someone, you know,” Jim said, quietly. “It’s not like it’s not reciprocated or anything. “

“Jim,” Leonard said, swallowing past the lump in his throat that prevented him from speaking. 

Jim shushed him, and said - “I know. Don’t deny it, Leonard.”

“I can’t do this, Jim,” Leonard said, before he turned to walk away. “Not now.” 

Jim watched him leave, confused as to what Leonard’s last words actually meant. 

~~~~

Jim was up and around three days later, and it had been painfully obvious to him that Leonard had stayed away from him. Jim wondered then if he’d pushed too far, had pushed because he’d wanted Leonard too much to let him get away any longer. Sadness crept through him every time he saw a flash of blue tunic, a tall frame with dark hair and he knew that Leonard couldn’t outrun him forever. The Enterprise was only so big after all, and Jim wasn’t about to abuse his position of Captain just to get some alone time with the doctor. He had thought about it however, of trapping Leonard alone in his quarters, of calling him to the Bridge to ream him out for avoiding him. He knew that that last option would only embarrass them both, so decided against it. 

~~~~

Leonard could feel Jim’s sadness and his pain from the separation, could hear his thoughts as Jim went through every possibility to get the doctor alone. Guilt washed through Leonard every time, and he knew that he had to talk to Jim eventually, if only to admit to his feelings for the Captain. 

He let himself be captured eventually by Jim while Sulu was showing Leonard a new strain of rose that he’d been growing in the hydroponics section of the Enterprise. Leonard heard Jim coming, heard Jim’s internal monologue of evasive doctors, coupled with occasional curses over same doctors and general feelings of being lost. Leonard had to smile at that, which caught Sulu’s attention.

“What?” Sulu asked, in confusion. “You were smiling.” 

“Jim’s coming,” Leonard said, before he could stop himself. 

“How the hell would you know something like that?” Sulu asked, even as Jim cleaved into view. “Oh, hey, you’re right. Jim’s coming.” 

He gave Leonard a confused glance as though he thought the other man had run mad or possibly turned psychic. 

“Sulu, leave us alone for a while, will you?” Jim asked, as soon as he reached Leonard's side. “I wanna talk to the doctor.” 

“Sure,” Sulu said, throwing Leonard another confused glance before melting away amongst the rose bushes.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” Jim said, outright once Sulu was out of sight and earshot. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you.” 

“You didn’t embarrass me, Jim,” Leonard said, meeting Jim’s gaze head on.

“Then what is it, then?” Jim asked, throwing his hands out wide and shrugging expansively. “Help me out, here, I’m lost.”

“So I heard,” Leonard said, without thinking. 

“Okay, that’s not confusing in the slightest,” Jim rejoined, as he frowned at Leonard. 

Leonard sighed and scrubbed one hand over his face wearily, mussing his hair slightly where it swept over his forehead.

“Dammit, Jim, I don’t know how to deal with this, okay? You didn’t embarrass me the other day. I walked away because you were right,” he said, weariness seeping into his tone and dragging his words down with it.

“You walked away because I was right? Forgive me for thinking this, Len, but I would have thought you’d stayed to talk it over or something,” Jim said. “I can’t understand you. If only I could see in your head, right now.” 

“Trust me, you do not wanna do that,” Leonard said, sharply. “I’ve had enough experience with seeing into your head to know it’s not comfortable.” 

“You’re not making sense, Bones,” Jim said, slowly, eyeing Leonard with a worried cast to his eyes.

“Look, something happened the other day when I tripped in my bathroom and hit my head,” Leonard said, before pausing and mulling over how he was going to present the rest of his case once he’d started. 

“Yeah?” Jim asked, expression equal parts concern and confusion. “You’re alright, aren’t you? You look alright.”

“I guess. Something happened to me when I hit my head. It was like I’d tuned into Jim Kirk Radio or something. Every last thought you had and I picked up on it,” Leonard explained.

“Get the hell out. You’re pulling my chain,” Jim laughed. “If you were anyone else, I’d say this was the biggest practical joke ever. “

“It’s true, Jim,” Leonard said. “Think something; it doesn’t matter what and I’ll tell you what you thought.”

“I don’t believe you, but I’ll do it anyway,” Jim said, grinning as he concentrated.

I‘ve wanted you for as long as I‘ve known you, he thought, with a big grin spreading over his face.

“You‘ve wanted me as long as you‘ve known me,” Leonard replied, slowly. 

“Jesus Christ, Bones. That‘s exactly what I thought,” Jim said, as he openly goggled at Leonard. “Okay, try this.” 

He closed his eyes and thought about kissing Leonard, half expecting the other man to push him away again. When he opened his eyes, Leonard was staring at him, a slight smile curving the corners of his mouth as he did so.

“I won’t push you away, Jim. I never could, not really,” Leonard said, softly. 

“Prove it,” Jim said, uncertainly, as he stepped forward into Leonard’s personal space.

He watched as Leonard swallowed, tongue lapping out to moisten his lower lip at that. He didn’t step away; instead he propped both hand s firmly on Jim’s waist and waited for the other man to lean in. Jim smiled, and did just that, lips brushing gently against lips. Leonard didn’t pull away, instead he closed his eyes and kissed him back, trying to push all of the desperation he’d felt the past few weeks into that minimal contact, gentle kisses turning harsh and needy. Jim was the first to pull away, breath huffing from between his lips as he stared at Leonard at close range. Leonard was the first to break the silence between them.

“I’ve got something to tell ya, Jim,” Leonard said, before falling silent again.

Jim made a questioning noise but didn’t speak outright. 

“I’ve wanted you for as long as I’ve known you too,” Leonard said, dropping his gaze in embarrassment. 

“Why didn’t you do something, before, then? I gave you the chance,” Jim replied, with a laugh. “In fact, I gave you plenty of chances.” 

“You were on your sick bed, Jim. I can’t take advantage of an ill patient,” Leonard said. “Besides, I was scared. I didn’t realize just how much I wanted you until I thought I’d almost lost you. Again.” 

“Even more reason to have said something sooner,” Jim said, with a playful shove to Leonard’s chest. 

He pulled him back when it seemed as though Leonard would step away, wrapping both arms around the other man’s waist to capture him and anchor his body against his. Leonard smiled and didn’t pull away again, accepting the hug for what it was, before sliding his arms around Jim’s waist in turn. Jim nodded in a - there, that's better - way, before continuing to speak.

“Don’t wait so long to do something next time,” he said, quietly. 

“I won’t,” Leonard replied, truthfully.

“Here, what am I thinking now?” Jim asked, a sudden roguish grin lighting up his face suddenly.

Leonard concentrated, feeling the link that had been formed between him and Jim already fading away. Still, he caught the last of Jim’s thoughts before the connection broke altogether - something about candlelight and being alone in Jim’s quarters. 

“I don’t need candles, Jim,” Leonard said, with a faint smile. “I just want you. I’ve always wanted you.” 

“You had me all along, you idiot,” Jim said. “Fine, I won’t bother with the candles. Be at my quarters tonight and you can make up for lost time.” 

“It‘s a deal,” Leonard said, in response, before he leant in to press a kiss against Jim’s mouth again. 

He felt Jim’s smile against his lips, even as the other man kissed him back, one hand propped against the back of Leonard’s head. Leonard found he was somewhat mourning the loss of hearing Jim’s thoughts, yet he found that it was a small price to pay if he had the man himself. 

 

~~ the end ~~


End file.
